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Reload page in style: light

good grief! there's some stupid fucking shit on this blog from this year. this spring and summer were extended lapses of reason; the full premises of my mind had suddenly been unlocked to me, and I picked the worst possible routes through them. I kept going from the kitchen to the living room through the connecting bathroom and not the main hall, stuff like that. purple prose aside, there was a lot of stuff going on that was making me miserable. its gone now. i stopped talking to people who made me feel worthless and horrible for not respecting feelings they would never explain to me. i stopped letting them ignore mine and undermine my sense of self. I've been taking pills that are slowly turning me into the real person and not the shell. none of you motherfuckers will be ready. none of you motherfuckers will EVER be ready.

cw: pet death
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Current Mood: accomplished

I dropped it on the floor and now it's always hitting enter. thank goodness, though- the replacement piece I need is only $20. I'm trying to avoid empathic sentiment about how it's the phone that took me to Massachusetts and back. it's just ill. I can heal it. in the meantime I'm on my old iphone. weird how much smoother it runs and how much less capable it is. It doesn't even run my favorite browser.

the ongoing project that this blog represents has entered a new stage. after an event involving my lashing out at somebody because of a baseless delusion I have decided to hire a psychiatrist. this has to come tomorrow, though, cus the ones I have in mind all seem to be open MWF. in the meantime I'll comply with an old tradition of this blog's and celebrate a holiday. Yeah, motherfucker!

Current Mood: blah
Current Music: timothy zahn - dark force rising